Zen Buddhism teaches a concept of “Shoshin“ (Beginner’s Mind), as a positive attribute that refers to having an attitude of openness, eagerness, and lack of preconceptions, just as a beginner would. Zen Master Shunryu Suzuki said, in his book Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind: Informal Talks on Zen Meditation and Practice; “In the Beginner’s Mind there are many possibilities. In the expert’s mind there are few.”
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There are many people who constantly pass unwarranted judgements upon others. As we go through life, we realize that not everyone is going to be on our side. There are people who simply want to bring others down in any way they can. One of the most important lessons I have learned in life is that people’s opinions of me do not define me.
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We are all human and we are all guilty of passing judgement at some point in our lives. Whether we want to admit it or not.
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You have the power to choose how the opinions of others affect you. You can allow their opinions to shape your view of yourself, or you can recognize their judgement as a reflection of themselves, and chose to move on.
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People tend to judge the things in others that they admire or are jealous of. They desire the same skills and attributes as you, and therefore try to point out your flaws. It’s important to remember that judgment is simply a projection of someone else’s insecurities onto you. It by no means is a reflection of the person you are.
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Judgment can be hurtful and it can cause you to doubt yourself and your abilities. You begin to question if the other person’s opinion is right. You may even try to change things about yourself to please the other person.
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But you must never allow your self-esteem or self-worth to be based upon the opinions of others. If you constantly seek to find your self-worth from external sources, you will never be happy with yourself. You have to find peace within yourself. The judgments of others are completely irrelevant, know your values.
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Unfortunately, you will never be able to escape judgement fully. If you are chasing after your goals and trying to accomplishing those things you’ve always wanted to, you will undoubtedly face judgment at some point. Therefore, decide to be the stronger person, replace your fears with truth, and never allow the opinions of others to change your perspective of yourself.
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Judging a person does not define who they are, it defines who you are. You decide how much power the opinions of other people will have in your life.