I had so many comments on a post I made recently about self-defense and fighting. Many people could not see the distinction between the two. Most people are taught physical/fighting skills FIRST in a self-defense lesson…. Again; there IS an overlap with the two, but they are NOT the same.
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Fighting is NOT self-defense/self-protection. Fighting COULD be a part of self-defense, but it is NOT self-defense/self-protection alone.
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“Remember, fighting skills aren’t the key to self-protection: fighting is what happens when self-protection goes bad.” – Iain Abernethy
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Self-defense is about survival. Period. Self-defense is not a matter of pride, dominance or having to win. Approaching conflict from a prideful perspective can lead you to engage in fights that you really don’t need to be in.
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It is better to have the mindset in a self-defense situation, of not looking to win, but rather not losing….. Someone said to me that winning is the same as not losing. NO, it isn’t. If you enter into a self-defense situation with the goal of winning, then where do you stop? Are you going to beat an attacker senseless just so that you can win? So you can see yourself victorious? Are you going to knock him out, make sure he is motionless on the ground? Broken bones or limbs? Where do you stop to win?
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Trying to win is leaving yourself open to further attacks, perhaps from others that may be in the vicinity. It’s never a good idea to take on multiple attackers.
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Not losing means that you may have been in a situation where you have been insulted, robbed, and possibly more. But you were not physically injured, you didn’t have to engage in a fight, you made it home. You had a choice. You lost your wallet, but you survived…… You didn’t win. You just didn’t lose.
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In a real conflict, there are real consequences, and this means that someone is most likely going to get hurt, or worse, lose their life. Are you prepared for those consequences just so that you can WIN a fight?
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Are there weapons involved? Chances are, if a knife is pulled out, someone is going to get cut. If a loaded gun is brought out, someone is going to get shot.
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If de-escalation and avoidance doesn’t work, then self-defense training is about preserving your well-being. YES, you may have to fight, but your MAIN goal should be escaping and getting home safely. The main goal of self-defense/self-protection is NOT fighting.
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I hope that helps. Stay safe. ??
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“The art of fighting, without fighting.” ~ Quote from Bruce Lee and Geoff Thompson
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? Picture courtesy of Geoff Thompson