“Winning is the reason why you compete and why sports exist, more than anything else. Is karate such a thing? Has karate been built on the principals of competition and winning? Or is karate based on forging a better person?” – Kenyu Chinen 9th dan Oshukai Shorin Ryu
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Self-protection, which we usually refer to as self-defense, is about survival. Period. Self-protection is not a matter of pride, or dominance, or having to win. Approaching a conflict from a prideful perspective can lead you to engage in fights that you really don’t need to be in.
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If all you practice in your dojo is fighting as self-defense, then the root of that problem is in practitioners and instructors being delusional about what it is they are training for. I see many fighters and martial artists that teach the only solution to every situation is to strike the offender. This is socially and legally irresponsible.
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“Remember, fighting skills aren’t the key to self-protection: fighting is what happens when self-protection goes bad.” – Iain Abernethy
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Many self-defense demonstrations you witness end with the attacker in a big heap on the floor, with you raining punches down upon them until they are motionless and unconscious. With broken bones or limbs.
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In a real conflict, there are real consequences, and this means that someone is most likely going to get hurt, or worse, lose their life. You either survive, or you don’t. And if you do, there are medical, legal, and psychological ramifications that may need to be dealt with.
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Your success or failure in most realistic self-defense situations is determined by what you do at the earliest possible stage. One of the most important things to realize about real personal safety training is that it starts way before anyone lays a hand on you. Before things become physical, self-defense has already started, in what is commonly called the pre-confrontation and pre-fight stages of a conflict.
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Are you able to maintain composure under threatening conditions? Most people have the fight reaction when put into a threatening situation. Composure is always something that should be trained alongside the physical techniques. Taking an attacker to the floor and raining punches and kicks down upon them isn’t the answer to most scenarios.
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You must practice consistently how you handle threatening conditions until you are calm and rational, able to de-escalate and avoid these scenarios. If de-escalation and avoidance doesn’t work, then self-defense training is about preserving your well-being. YES, you may have to fight, but your MAIN goal should be escaping and getting away safely.
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The main goal of self-protection is NOT fighting. And this should be a major part of your training. If striking is the only self-defense technique you practice, you’ve only scratched the surface of the skills you may find yourself needing. 
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